Guess what? It’s not just Korra that I theorize over.

Massive, far-reaching, outlandish ideas about the plot of Homestuck under the cut! Be warned: huge spoilers all the way up to the update posted a few hours ago.

I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about uu and Calliope, especially now that it’s canon that they share a body.

It’s pretty clear at this point that the cherub siblings are a giant Saw reference, so it’s not exactly revelatory to imagine that uu will be cutting off the leg that Calliope’s chain is attached to and then escaping. And of course, at some point, he replaces it with a pegleg.

Continuing in the vein of obvious conclusions…

Yeah, this is all about as subtle as a brick to the face. But here’s where the speculation comes in.

First off, the connections to Cal and jujus.

Cal is referred to by undyingUmbrage as a Juju, one of many, each of which only exists to turn the lives of everyone who shares a universe with one of them into a nightmare. He tells Dirk he should cut up and burn Cal, referring to the puppet as a bad omen. This particular Cal’s eyes are described by uu as looking dead, and he speculates that the Cal may be untainted. He later changes his mind, now believing that the dead-eyed Cal may be even more dangerous than one with normal eyes. uu also claims that only one juju can exist at any given time and cannot be copied, so if Cal appears in both reality and dreams, one of the Cals must be either an illusion or an error that will soon be corrected.

When cherubs go God Tier, they take on the aspects of Jujus, whom they are extremely attached to - be it through fear or love. Jujus that don’t have dead eyes have eyes like Lord English’s - rapidly flickering objects that may or may not always be pool balls.

And the reason LE keeps moving on to new universes is that the versions of him in each keep getting “corrected”. This is important later.

Now, on to the cherubs themselves.

What if the physical body the two share is the same, but they have separate dreamselves? Calling out one cherub “sibling’s” name puts their dreamself to sleep and wakes them up in the physical body, meaning that uu has control while Calliope’s dreamself is awake in Prospit. So when Calliope takes her nap, uu gets control and has Jack attack and brutally murder her. Now uu is in complete control and Calliope can’t wake up. At some point in the story, uu goes god tier by having his dreamself killed, meaning the physical body is both extremely powerful and the only body left between the two.

Lord English is a demon who can travel through any universe once it has been destroyed, correct? Essentially, his goal is to travel through the multiverse and wreak havoc on as many civilizations as he can. That’s all we know about him and what he’s trying to do, unless I’m forgetting something.

Maybe Lord English is someone who lost his session. Like, say, a cherub who attempted to win his session by killing his partner and ended up unable to complete it without her.

This hypothetical cherub is wracked with guilt and self-hate because he lost the most important game of all. We’ve seen how uu hates to lose, how fanatically he embraces gaming, and how he’s willing to go to bizarre and convoluted extremes to get even slightly closer to winning. Losing Sburb/Sgrub/Swhateverhecallsit is a constant irritation that drives him mad. So he’s traveling through as many dead universes as he can in an attempt to reshape them into a new universe that he helped to create. You know, like the ultimate goal of a session.

Specifically, look at how he beat Calliope at chess. He took his pieces and disguised them as something else. Now he’s trying to do that to entire universes!

The only problem? His method for traveling between universes is also destroying them.

Black holes of stellar mass are expected to form when very massive stars collapse at the end of their life cycle. After a black hole has formed it can continue to grow by absorbing mass from its surroundings. By absorbing other stars and merging with other black holes, supermassive black holes of millions of solar masses may form. There is general consensus that supermassive black holes exist in the centers of most galaxies.

Lord English is traveling between universes by somehow using black holes as portals through the Furthest Ring (perhaps by utilizing the latent Muse of Space powers hidden in his physical form), starting with the one created by the collapse of his world’s star. Initializing the ~ath code tied to a universe that heralds his arrival is usually performed by the arrival of the slowly-growing supermassive black hole created by the death of the cherub’s red sun.

In his frenzy to win the game, Lord English is exposing universe after universe to this supermassive black hole, which in turn causes it to grow even larger and more powerful. Thanks to the nonlinear temporal properties of the Furthest Ring that the black hole is growing in, LE’s time travel powers become a moot point once the black hole begins overpowering his current universe, and his multiple selves are “corrected” as per the laws of the jujus he has taken on aspects of.

The supermassive black hole is eating universes and growing to such an extent that it is starting to threaten the Furthest Ring itself, and an increasing number of the horrorterrors that reside there are being destroyed by it, necessitating their pleas for help to the Derse dreamers. If it isn’t contained somehow, it will threaten the Green Sun itself, leading to the destruction of every universe that ever was or will be and eradicating any and all life from everything.

Lord English is not the ultimate threat the kids are facing.

A consuming force of nature with the potential to swallow up everything is.

(Oh, and in other news, I think that we’ll be getting the End of Act 6 Act 3 flash before the end of the week. My gut’s telling me it’s going to be tomorrow night.)